Hi
I am here again with a new venture.Dunno how its gonna turn to be.. ok..I have a junior friend , cranky fellow named kumar who accompanies me in my shuttle. We have a cool gang in our shuttle. Kumar is the snacks supplier for us everyday.So we take great pride in leg vaaring him.Here I am gonna try to architect his dream, ambition , goal or whtever.. Please imagine all that I am describing here.
His Aim: To become a CEO of an IT company
His Wish: To be a Nattamai
His Interest : Tamil
His Goal: To munnetrify his village.
His Ultimate Intention : To be the __________ Lets fill this gap after the dream description.
Fast forward by 15 years…
Kumar has set up an IT company in his Village Tamarind Hills originally long long ago it was called Puliam patti.Kumar ‘s Company has been named
"Tatkalli Corporation“
He has constructed a huge building for his firm which is ring shaped.All his money he has earned by working in a chip company and doing a business of his own.
Kumar is a hard working fellow who completed his schooling at Puliampatti , a small village near erode and then continued to pursue his UG AND PG together at a famous college in Coimbatore.College has advertised telling “One vaanginaa, onnu free”
Then he got placed in the chip company and started his job as a QA where he worked above and beyond by serving fellow collegues like booking irctc tatkal tickets,IPL tickets, supplying snacks in shuttle, mokkaipottufying anybody he catches, smiling at all gals, still wants people to call him as “Nalla Payyan”. He then decided to start a business on his own and started ploughing his fields to see if he got any granite..
But then all tht he could get is mud , sand , worms and few more garbage..
Then he started cultivating plants and started his business. “Singam onnum purappatadhe namakku nalla kaalam”.. Like in a song..he started producing lots of crops.. selling all the insects that he could find on his fields . in the form of Chinese Manchurian.. He set up a new restaurant.. Converted the bullock cart into a car shaped vehicle and started his eco-friendly car model. He set up orphanage, old age home..etc etc..all that Padaippa did..
Now coming to the IT company.. In the center of the building , there s a big aaaala maram..under which Kumar had his office..”Aatha kara marame..arasa mara ilaye..” He doesn’t have a chair but a jamakaaalam..He sits under the tree on a jamakalam.His PA carries a Sombu in hand. His attire is white and white..white shirt and white dhoti..
“Ramrajkku Salute”
Company’s dress code is the same. All employees r supposed to follow CEO’s dressing. The eligibility of people to apply for this company is they should be native of the 18 villages around Pulliampatti and CEO is “ Padhinettu pattikum.. Rasa”. And they should know how to book tatkal tickets using IRCTC. Thts the interview.. They ll be asked to book tatkal tickets using dial up connection..
Since the IP(intellectual property) inside the company is increasing day by day..They have a tight security system around the building. All the security men will be dressed like kaaval theivam.
There will be a big Ayyanar statue with Aruvaaal along with a white horse in the entrance which is sensor based and can catch any intrusion into the company. Every day morning CEO worships and sings..”Vella kudhiraiyile..Thannannaane.. Odi Varugayile Thannangane”..
All important meetings are held under the tree. When the board of directors meet , when the CEO opens his mouth to decide…directors will shout ..”Naatamai Theerpa..maathi sollllu”
High Performing employees will be given onsite opportunity to go to Chennai.But because of cultural differences..CEO is not willing to set up a branch out there.
Every Year , there used to be a great festival in the company where people r honored with Jigirdhandha, Allowed to play Raatinam.., Kite etc etc..This annual fest is called in local language as Thiruvizhaaa….
“Thiruvizhaaanu vandha iva Kovil vara maata..” CEO sings..
If somebody is chucked out of the company , they r given all honors and sent out in a bullock cart when CEO sings....”Poraaale Ponnuthaayi..pogira pokkil..manasa thottu”
When the CEO gives quarterly updates.. he is brought from his office with mudhal mariyaadhai..BG song..”Puliam Veeran Thaanai..Avanai usipi vittaaan veene..Visil Parakkum thane..” Kumar’s Grand ma Paravai Puliamma .. is a visiting Guest and holds power of attorney of the company..
When managers r giving performance appraisal results.. They usually sing songs “Moonu rendaanga, Rendu Onnaanga..Vaanga sonnen..ginchaa ginchaa ginchaa..”
More to follow in next episode..
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Crazy Carrom
There were two friends/colleagues of the same team sitting next to each other in their cubicles.For simplicity sake, Lets name them A and B. A shouting “hey B..come lets play”
B: “ little busy..5 min.. plz”
A: “Alright!”
After 7 min..
A:”Seri podhum get up”
B:”Hmm just ramping up something…”
A got wild and came to B’s desk…by the time..B has locked her desktop..
A: “Enakku doubtaaave irukke..nee silentaaa busyaa work panrana..hmm..”
B:”ok..Lets go..”
While walking towards the games room..
B:” Indha project evlo strategic importance irukku theriyuma..idhunaala namba revenue..X $ &*^%%(%^ ..It needs a sound domain..analysis..*&^( I was talking to architect&^#*(@*()&) production support&^#*(^# mining*!^#*(^( results…&*^(^ resource *(&@( innovation etc etc…
A:”Eii..niruthu…right…I believe..that..u were working..”
Both of them entered into the games room and arranged themselves on the chairs opp to each other.
B:” I want a rotating chair ..appo than easya direction shift panni set panniadika mudiyum”
PS: B doesn’t know to play good carom..All that she knows is to hit coins..
A: Sabbaaa..
B: I don’t think this light is good.. Its distracting..wht do u say..
A: Hello!!! (grrrrr)
B: Too much of powder ya..
A: COmeon…Edhuva irundhaalum seri..learn to play in constraints..
B: Okay!!!
A arranges the coins and B starts playing..B gives a power shot.. Coins fly in different direction and Two gets pocketed.
A:Getthu..!!! very good..
A starts playing and they play in turns..
They hear a sound..”Hey Barbie..Hey Ken”… A’s mobile rings.. A takes it up ..”Hmm..yes..apram pesaren..ok..fine…illa..hmm..later…k…bye” ..Cha!! Yaaro wrong number!!!
Play continues…Now they hear a music..”Show me the meaning of being lonely…”
B’s mobile rings..B:” Yeah….Oh Yaaaa…yes…ofcourse..when..yeahhh…ohh yeah..super..fine then..no thanks..bye bye..”B gets a call from a bank..regarding Credit card.. (only aaarudhall for single people who don’t get any calls in their mobile..)
Play continues… B fixes a coin as a target..B tries to hit it in every chance.
B: “Nee konjam help pannalaamla..to achieve my target..”
A then takes it near the pocket and B in her turn takes it somewhere..same thing happens in iteration..
B decides..this time.. Final..and hits the striker hard..and the target coin flies in the air.The coin was porikified and placed in the center again..After some n tries..B achieves the target..By the time..all coins have been pocketed by A including Red and Follow.But still B has achieved her target..A says..
A:“Naa first oru coin pottenla adhaan en target..”
B: “ little busy..5 min.. plz”
A: “Alright!”
After 7 min..
A:”Seri podhum get up”
B:”Hmm just ramping up something…”
A got wild and came to B’s desk…by the time..B has locked her desktop..
A: “Enakku doubtaaave irukke..nee silentaaa busyaa work panrana..hmm..”
B:”ok..Lets go..”
While walking towards the games room..
B:” Indha project evlo strategic importance irukku theriyuma..idhunaala namba revenue..X $ &*^%%(%^ ..It needs a sound domain..analysis..*&^( I was talking to architect&^#*(@*()&) production support&^#*(^# mining*!^#*(^( results…&*^(^ resource *(&@( innovation etc etc…
A:”Eii..niruthu…right…I believe..that..u were working..”
Both of them entered into the games room and arranged themselves on the chairs opp to each other.
B:” I want a rotating chair ..appo than easya direction shift panni set panniadika mudiyum”
PS: B doesn’t know to play good carom..All that she knows is to hit coins..
A: Sabbaaa..
B: I don’t think this light is good.. Its distracting..wht do u say..
A: Hello!!! (grrrrr)
B: Too much of powder ya..
A: COmeon…Edhuva irundhaalum seri..learn to play in constraints..
B: Okay!!!
A arranges the coins and B starts playing..B gives a power shot.. Coins fly in different direction and Two gets pocketed.
A:Getthu..!!! very good..
A starts playing and they play in turns..
They hear a sound..”Hey Barbie..Hey Ken”… A’s mobile rings.. A takes it up ..”Hmm..yes..apram pesaren..ok..fine…illa..hmm..later…k…bye” ..Cha!! Yaaro wrong number!!!
Play continues…Now they hear a music..”Show me the meaning of being lonely…”
B’s mobile rings..B:” Yeah….Oh Yaaaa…yes…ofcourse..when..yeahhh…ohh yeah..super..fine then..no thanks..bye bye..”B gets a call from a bank..regarding Credit card.. (only aaarudhall for single people who don’t get any calls in their mobile..)
Play continues… B fixes a coin as a target..B tries to hit it in every chance.
B: “Nee konjam help pannalaamla..to achieve my target..”
A then takes it near the pocket and B in her turn takes it somewhere..same thing happens in iteration..
B decides..this time.. Final..and hits the striker hard..and the target coin flies in the air.The coin was porikified and placed in the center again..After some n tries..B achieves the target..By the time..all coins have been pocketed by A including Red and Follow.But still B has achieved her target..A says..
A:“Naa first oru coin pottenla adhaan en target..”
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Make Up illa..Naturals..
It was a normal Friday like any other day.We all packed up our bags and had dinner outside and screamed looking at the clock.And started early so that we can reach the Majestic station at the right time to catch our usual Chennai Mail.We dragged our heavy bags of unwashed clothes and finally got into an auto.Auto was heading towards mysore bank road.Full of traffic..
K: Omg! Konjam paaren..chance se illa..time ippove 10.15 PM..epdi poga mudiyum..
B:Actually indha traffic la vehicles should not stand..adhukku oru GPS tracking vecchu..vehicle fit panni..streamline senju..timer set panna…
C:Elllaaam set panni..battery buzz aagi..timer ottai aagi.. vehicles thiruppi ipdi trafficla nikkum..
K: Ada cha..loosungala..lets think and decide..
C:Hey oru short cutla..indha roadaa easyaa cross pannidalaam..actually indha left la sandhula..cut panni straightaa poi..right la pona..
K: Enna varum..
C: Sariya nyabagam illa..
K:Grrrrr…
C: Seri..CANT poidalaaam..ippove decide pannanum..poi indha roadla maatikka koodaadhu..
B: “Bhaiya..CANT hogi..”
Autodriver: (*******something in kannada***) (translation as perceived by me) (ada..ittha munnadiye sollakoodathu….)
Auto heads towards CANT railway station..
All of us got down..and walked into the station..
C:Hey..indha station..neataaa irukku..aaana anga anga lesa kuppai irukku…
K:Ei ..un reportaa niruthu.. indha platformla than train varumaa..
B: Hmm..yes..at 10.55 PM..
K: Seri ok..lets go and stand near the our Sn(1<=n<=14 usually) coach..(coach number maradhuten..:) )..
So many people… were standing..
C arbitrarily looks at some random stochastic guy..who was handsome on a probability of 0.8 given condition that he is single..
This was noticed by B..B also looks in the same ..direction..
Both of this ..noticed by K..
K: Ada cha..inga vandhum start panniteengala..naaane train eppo varum nu tensionaa iruken..dogs man neenga…
No place was there for these people to sit..So they chose some place and placed their bags down and they were standing..
Oru benchla oru gal..sumaaara…infront were standing two people..oru curd rice fellow..pakkathula..oru semma rangeaa oru gal..
The one sitting named as Nandhita..she s gonna get married looks like..in Chennai..
Scene Gal(SG): Hey nandu…indha sareela..bridal seven vaanga poriya..illati..muhurtham collection paaka poriya..
Nandhita was giving some answers..
CRF (curd rice fellow): Hey nand..iva ipdi..thaan ethaachum loosu maari kepa…unga aathula..yaarachum…non veg saapduvaala..illa..unakku nandu nu per vecchirkaale.. he heh he
Nandhita and SG started laughing out..like anything..
Then conversation continues..(nakshatra diamonds, platinum, Naturals parlour.,..Loreal hair color..etc,..temple jewellery)
K,B,C look at each other..Hayyo vera engayaachum polaama..
Announcement is heard..”Gaadi number.. iradu..aaaru..aiiidhu..entu..platform..number 2 ku.. appram..i forgot..matter ennana.. 11.15 ku varum apdinu..”
“Oh man..” wht do we do???..
At 11.15 PM.. A light comes..
B: Hey train came..jingu jikka jingo jikka..
K: Eri..udane paduthudanum..semma tired..
C: (busy..gtalking..with her colleague.. “train late..” and buzzing and facebook messaging..
Suddenly got a message in gtalk..it was B “eii boring pa..”)
Light came near with a sound…”oinggggggggggggggg”….
BULB>. It was only an engine..
C: ada cha..its okay..(and carries on with its own work and dreaming looking at the sky)..
Two more trains..passed away which was scheduled to start after our train..
Announcement: Gaadi..etc etc… 00.15 AM..
OH MY GOD!!!!
Next kaveri express is heading…
C:Indha trainla laam namba madhichirpoma( this train used to start 1 hour later than Chennai mail)..
Station started becoming empty ,so we all got some place..to sit..after a long standing of 1.5 hours..
A couple ..standing next to us..
Wife: Train varudhaa..?
Husband:Walkig near the track coming back..he was oscillating here and thr..chumma scene..
Aaah..varudhu vaa vaa..eduthu vechiko..
Wife: Ada varatum…
Husband gets furious..: u never listen to me..naa sonna unakku ippo puriyaadhu..apram..feel pannuve..come on..seekiram..vandhudhuchu..enna panra..
Wife takes all the bags herself and goes near the track..
K:Idhu..ennava irukum..
C: Idhuvum..oru vela engineaa irukumoo…
B: ok lets get up when we confirm that its train..
Finally engine came this time..two engine attached to each other..
Wife gave a nasty look to her husband..
Behind the Bench..one couple..looks like they visited Blore for the first time and a friend has come down to give a send off..
Guy: Ada cha…enna ooru da ungaladhu..pesaaama carliye poirupen..nalla varudhu po indha train..
Gal Almost drained out ..oru pole la..saaanjutaanga..
Friend: Dei..idhu nalla trainda..inikki than ipdi..
Guy: Seri..nee start pannuda..unakku time ayidichu..nalla naallaye..12 maniki office pove..nalaikki nee povenaama..kelambu kelambu..aaluta vera nee kadalai podanum..start pannuda..
Friend: thinks for a while and puts some scene..like “parvalapa..idhulenna irukku…wait panren..NANBENDA.. etc etc..” and finally left in another 2 min telling..”Train vandha missed call viduda.illa message pannnu.”
Guy: kavala padaadha ..call panren…
Friend: Dei adhudhaan venaamnu solren..veetuku poi enaku importantaa vela irukuda..seri bye..
Nee call pannalanaalum parvala..
(idhuku NANBENDA..dialog vera)..
B:Hey C ..enakku oru idea....indha train laaam varudhula..adhu nikka ve koodadhu..
C: (Half Asleep..) en pa..
B: Makkalaaam oru platela erikanum..train varecha..plateaa kondu poidum..avanga station vandha..plate disconnect ayidum..
C: enna plate..meals plateaaa..
K: Kadavule..enna kaaapathave maateengala..enna kodumai saravana idhu..
Time clock ticks 1:30 AM..
Next a light comes..again verum engine..
Guy: Dei driver..pinnadi train varudhaa..
Driver gives a strange look.
C: Hey B..evanavadhu un friend Majesticla eraaangala?
B: Yes..one guy..namba junior..
C: train start ayiduchaanu kelu..
B: Yes I ll message him..”r u in train” and gets a reply “S”
B: Avan trainla than irukaanaam..
C:..Eii adhu kelambichuna..message panna sollu..
B: Avan aaloda kadalai pottu irupaane.Avalum andha trainla than iruka...naa epdi disturb panna…
C: inga paaru..appo aaluku message panni sollu..
B: Okok..(She messages and he tells..”ok”)
Finally train comes..
And we all got into it…
All of us started sleeping ..
Suddenly C gets up..at 4.00 AM looks out..
She hears..” Chennai varai sellum kaveri express..muppadhu (30) nimidam thaamadhamaaga vandhu kondirukiradhu..”
C’s face brightens and she thinks..ennadhan..naaamba payasama lateaa start pannalum.. seekiram thayir saadhathukku vandhachu ..super..
North Indian version: “Ennadhaan namba soupaa latelaaa start pannalum..cheekiram dessertku vandhaachula..”
Monday, February 28, 2011
Wallpapers
There was an IT /Software company in an XXX highway , exactly 250 km away from a major city near Gulkandu.The company is not operating now.Its almost closed and its kind of a museum. The company was flourishing some time back. It used to be top firm ranking number one in placements.Students in ENgg college used to aim for this company as they do for Microsoft /Google/Facebook these days.Their share value was several dollars that many people became pawn brokers and big shots by trading them
Here is a small story describing what has happened in the past that has led to this state of that office now.
8 years back on this same day Feb 28th , it was not a leap year u know, there was a guy named Anbuselvan.in the morning , he walked into cafeteria and as usual he had his plate of two idlis and one vadai, he finished the breakfast and went to his cube. To his astonishment , he stuck against the wal of the cube as if trying to climb the wall. He couldn’t get him out form that position. People ran to his desk to rescue him , but in vain.They called the security and tried to dismantle the cube, still , nothing worked out he was completely stuck on the wall.There was no risk to his life , yet he couldn’t relieve him out of the wall.His family got worried and the company arranged to feed him and provide other facilities as he was stuck on the wall. After this stunning incident, the very next day , a HR named Vellalulu after finishing his lunch went to a conference room for an interview, he too got stuck against the wall .And the company had two such incidents consequently and there was a generic panic among the employees.Company tried to investigate this upon, but they couldn’t nail down to anything solid.this still continued to be a mystery.The same thing started happening for different people in the company on varied frequency with enough standard distribution.But the pattern was still not consistent for any inference to be made. There were more and more people getting stuck on walls permanently which created a freeze on the company’s productivity and untold sorrow for employees families.
From developers to QA, Managers to tech leads, to architects, more and more people permanently on walls. Then the CEO of that company got really worried as this has become a hype place for media.New spread across all channels and everybody from café to tea boards to canteens to kanyendhi bhavan started discussing about this . The brand name of the company was seriously hit.People from other branches refused to travel to this branch and the office facility was completely discarded. The CEO with his board of directors held an emergency meeting to discuss upon the issue.They recruited a special person called Vettri , He is a Software Engineer by profession , a doctorate in Data Mining with crime and thriller investigation as his hobby.They found this guy suitable to find the cause of this problem.He did several experiments and tests to figure out and find out the cause.With lots of roller coaster results,
He finally caught the pattern and was successfully nailing down the issue.He then did several experiments to confirm this and submitted a report finally.The report was shocking and astonishing.The pattern was like this.All of them who got stuck against the wall when they tried to sit were people who washed their hands in a wash basin near the cafeteria and used a tissue paper and threw them in a particular dustbin. There was a ghost associated with the diustbin.The ghost is related to the soul of a lizard which was cruelly killed and thrown inside this dustbin .Hence it made people got stuck to the walls like a lizard.The company acted upon the results of the report and threw the dustbin outside.They recovered all people who got stuck on the wall.Mr Vettri was given international awards for his excellent investigation and discovery.This is also going to be made as a film with ARR music which is sure to win several Oscars as stated by Mr Vettri
Mr Vettri sings happily "Paadariyen Pattern ariyen..Balli koodam naan ariyen.."
Here is a small story describing what has happened in the past that has led to this state of that office now.
8 years back on this same day Feb 28th , it was not a leap year u know, there was a guy named Anbuselvan.in the morning , he walked into cafeteria and as usual he had his plate of two idlis and one vadai, he finished the breakfast and went to his cube. To his astonishment , he stuck against the wal of the cube as if trying to climb the wall. He couldn’t get him out form that position. People ran to his desk to rescue him , but in vain.They called the security and tried to dismantle the cube, still , nothing worked out he was completely stuck on the wall.There was no risk to his life , yet he couldn’t relieve him out of the wall.His family got worried and the company arranged to feed him and provide other facilities as he was stuck on the wall. After this stunning incident, the very next day , a HR named Vellalulu after finishing his lunch went to a conference room for an interview, he too got stuck against the wall .And the company had two such incidents consequently and there was a generic panic among the employees.Company tried to investigate this upon, but they couldn’t nail down to anything solid.this still continued to be a mystery.The same thing started happening for different people in the company on varied frequency with enough standard distribution.But the pattern was still not consistent for any inference to be made. There were more and more people getting stuck on walls permanently which created a freeze on the company’s productivity and untold sorrow for employees families.
From developers to QA, Managers to tech leads, to architects, more and more people permanently on walls. Then the CEO of that company got really worried as this has become a hype place for media.New spread across all channels and everybody from café to tea boards to canteens to kanyendhi bhavan started discussing about this . The brand name of the company was seriously hit.People from other branches refused to travel to this branch and the office facility was completely discarded. The CEO with his board of directors held an emergency meeting to discuss upon the issue.They recruited a special person called Vettri , He is a Software Engineer by profession , a doctorate in Data Mining with crime and thriller investigation as his hobby.They found this guy suitable to find the cause of this problem.He did several experiments and tests to figure out and find out the cause.With lots of roller coaster results,
He finally caught the pattern and was successfully nailing down the issue.He then did several experiments to confirm this and submitted a report finally.The report was shocking and astonishing.The pattern was like this.All of them who got stuck against the wall when they tried to sit were people who washed their hands in a wash basin near the cafeteria and used a tissue paper and threw them in a particular dustbin. There was a ghost associated with the diustbin.The ghost is related to the soul of a lizard which was cruelly killed and thrown inside this dustbin .Hence it made people got stuck to the walls like a lizard.The company acted upon the results of the report and threw the dustbin outside.They recovered all people who got stuck on the wall.Mr Vettri was given international awards for his excellent investigation and discovery.This is also going to be made as a film with ARR music which is sure to win several Oscars as stated by Mr Vettri
Mr Vettri sings happily "Paadariyen Pattern ariyen..Balli koodam naan ariyen.."
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Its a Thriller..!!!
Hi
I am back again with some stuff to share with you.Quite interesting …
It was 11.00 in the late morning ..its usually the time for a small cup of coffee , our office common announcement rang “Its time to take a break”… ..When I was about to leave for the coffee, I encountered a teammate with whom I was caught up in a small discussion.Yes..finally I was late for the coffee and walked up to my mentor’s cube. We usually have coffee in a group of 3+.. I was successful in interrupting her work..and we walked towards the pantry….Asariri told me.i would write a story today..but my stupid brain was clueless of what that would be about.. ..With this thought in mind..we filled our cups and walked towards a glass wall..We were people who establish principles and break them..establish rules and rule over them..this rule was 20:20:20..which we never failed to miss..Its good to take a break every 20 minutes....by looking at an object (be it a cube, a conf room, a tree, a building..a handsome guy (preferable) ) which is at a distance greater than or equal to 20 metres , for 20 seconds.. .. As usual ..conversation began ..
Mentor : Hey char!.. I wanted to tell you something interesting..
Char: Yes boss!..tell me..ungal sindhanaiyai inge sidharavidungal…
Mentor: I heard of a story from my neighbor…looks like it took place in our area..
Char: What..wht happened..
Mentor : A murder..
Char : Kya..Kya hua? (with whtever hindi I know)…(adhann murdernu sollitaangala..aprom enna..scene..)
Mentor: Yeah..It took place exactly at 12:00 in the night..
U know our area is fully covered with thick trees as in forest….(athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu..) that being the case..there are approximately n+3 streets .. n being < = 10…
Even if you apply binomial distribution… (seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu.)
From the north eastern side there was a wild wind blowing towards the south western side..have you noticed this strange behavior ever..
Char: Ennadhu..wind..directionaaaa?No ..i haven’t noticed..wind direction..anything significant about that?
Mentor: seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu …ok…appo along with the wind..there was a slightly non humid chill air that was blowing.. ..birds were chirping at their highest possible frequency..appo na..wavelenth imagine panniko..
Char: Romba lowaaa irukume…
Mentor: Correct.. seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu….appo XXX area , YY blockla..irukara 3 streets la mattum..traffic will be little less…that being the case..in the middle street.. there was a south indian tiffin shop..
Char: Aiii correct..i have been there..ange kuli paniyaaram semmaiya irukum..
Mentor: .. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu … ..If you go straight down the street… there would be a lamp post..
Char: 1 by lambda , lamp post..ethachum correlation coefficient irukkumo..
Mentor: Stop..Listen to me …Andha lamp post was not working that day…the light was put off…. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu .. Along side..there were three bungalows.. they were painted in Red , Blue and Green…
Char: WOwww..Orangeaa irundha superaa irukum..
Mentor: Come on… namakku adhu ippo important kidaiyaadhu … ….next to these bungalows .was a new..tantri flat ..it had 20 floors..Lights were glowing on less than half the floors where few children..prepared for their IIT JEE entrance…
At that time there were exactly 66 cars parked in the underground car park..seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu…On the eastern side of the flat..there was light switched on in a hall of ZZZ number flat.. It had a small family ..husband and wife..(they were pretty old..) thattha and paati..their children were living in united states..and they were alone here..the younger brother of the wife of their elder son..just married his lover whom he loved for 27 years ..from Play school it seems…..seri.. namakku adhu ippo important kidaiyaadhu… paaati had cooked seppangkingangu mor kulambu with vaazhaipoo parupu usili..they had finished their dinner..and thattha was watching the ICC world cup match… seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu anyways..
Char: 1 more hour for lunch..
Mentor: Listen..Next door is ZZZ+1 house..there was a small family again ..a couple and a kid..The couple had done their UG in IITM ..angeye..rendu perum maathi maathi arrears vaangi..both fell in love on the common grounds of arrears..and they got married…as their parents felt they were completely hopeless.. seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu..the kid was crying so long ..and has just slept..Husband was responsible for the kid’s sleep..so at that..the wife was in the kitchen..the kitchen was approximately 10*7 sq feet ..It had a super modular kitchen with Faber chimney..their wooden work was in light golden brown and red compressed wood finishing..in the rack above she has kept..rice floor, wheat floor..dhal floor..sugar, salt and other garins.In the rack below..she has kept..plates of different sizes, tumblers.. cups..small plates..spoons..etc..next to this rack..was a space for keeping LPG cylinder..next to that there was a provision for the outlet of the stainless steel sink..next to that..was a space for dustbin ..inside that dustbin.,,,there was dead cockroach..karapaaanpoochi....in the mean time..the wife was standing with a shocking face..stunned by her act..
Char: Woww….my god.. what a murder..bayama irukku…
Char shouts..”Thalai..neenga engeyo poiteenga..” and falls at her mentor’s feet…
Char:”With your permission..shall I write this as a story in my blog…with some Aachi masala..”
Mentor: grrrrr……….
I am back again with some stuff to share with you.Quite interesting …
It was 11.00 in the late morning ..its usually the time for a small cup of coffee , our office common announcement rang “Its time to take a break”… ..When I was about to leave for the coffee, I encountered a teammate with whom I was caught up in a small discussion.Yes..finally I was late for the coffee and walked up to my mentor’s cube. We usually have coffee in a group of 3+.. I was successful in interrupting her work..and we walked towards the pantry….Asariri told me.i would write a story today..but my stupid brain was clueless of what that would be about.. ..With this thought in mind..we filled our cups and walked towards a glass wall..We were people who establish principles and break them..establish rules and rule over them..this rule was 20:20:20..which we never failed to miss..Its good to take a break every 20 minutes....by looking at an object (be it a cube, a conf room, a tree, a building..a handsome guy (preferable) ) which is at a distance greater than or equal to 20 metres , for 20 seconds.. .. As usual ..conversation began ..
Mentor : Hey char!.. I wanted to tell you something interesting..
Char: Yes boss!..tell me..ungal sindhanaiyai inge sidharavidungal…
Mentor: I heard of a story from my neighbor…looks like it took place in our area..
Char: What..wht happened..
Mentor : A murder..
Char : Kya..Kya hua? (with whtever hindi I know)…(adhann murdernu sollitaangala..aprom enna..scene..)
Mentor: Yeah..It took place exactly at 12:00 in the night..
U know our area is fully covered with thick trees as in forest….(athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu..) that being the case..there are approximately n+3 streets .. n being < = 10…
Even if you apply binomial distribution… (seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu.)
From the north eastern side there was a wild wind blowing towards the south western side..have you noticed this strange behavior ever..
Char: Ennadhu..wind..directionaaaa?No ..i haven’t noticed..wind direction..anything significant about that?
Mentor: seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu …ok…appo along with the wind..there was a slightly non humid chill air that was blowing.. ..birds were chirping at their highest possible frequency..appo na..wavelenth imagine panniko..
Char: Romba lowaaa irukume…
Mentor: Correct.. seri.. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu….appo XXX area , YY blockla..irukara 3 streets la mattum..traffic will be little less…that being the case..in the middle street.. there was a south indian tiffin shop..
Char: Aiii correct..i have been there..ange kuli paniyaaram semmaiya irukum..
Mentor: .. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu … ..If you go straight down the street… there would be a lamp post..
Char: 1 by lambda , lamp post..ethachum correlation coefficient irukkumo..
Mentor: Stop..Listen to me …Andha lamp post was not working that day…the light was put off…. athu namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu .. Along side..there were three bungalows.. they were painted in Red , Blue and Green…
Char: WOwww..Orangeaa irundha superaa irukum..
Mentor: Come on… namakku adhu ippo important kidaiyaadhu … ….next to these bungalows .was a new..tantri flat ..it had 20 floors..Lights were glowing on less than half the floors where few children..prepared for their IIT JEE entrance…
At that time there were exactly 66 cars parked in the underground car park..seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu…On the eastern side of the flat..there was light switched on in a hall of ZZZ number flat.. It had a small family ..husband and wife..(they were pretty old..) thattha and paati..their children were living in united states..and they were alone here..the younger brother of the wife of their elder son..just married his lover whom he loved for 27 years ..from Play school it seems…..seri.. namakku adhu ippo important kidaiyaadhu… paaati had cooked seppangkingangu mor kulambu with vaazhaipoo parupu usili..they had finished their dinner..and thattha was watching the ICC world cup match… seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu anyways..
Char: 1 more hour for lunch..
Mentor: Listen..Next door is ZZZ+1 house..there was a small family again ..a couple and a kid..The couple had done their UG in IITM ..angeye..rendu perum maathi maathi arrears vaangi..both fell in love on the common grounds of arrears..and they got married…as their parents felt they were completely hopeless.. seri.. namakku ippo important kidaiyaadhu..the kid was crying so long ..and has just slept..Husband was responsible for the kid’s sleep..so at that..the wife was in the kitchen..the kitchen was approximately 10*7 sq feet ..It had a super modular kitchen with Faber chimney..their wooden work was in light golden brown and red compressed wood finishing..in the rack above she has kept..rice floor, wheat floor..dhal floor..sugar, salt and other garins.In the rack below..she has kept..plates of different sizes, tumblers.. cups..small plates..spoons..etc..next to this rack..was a space for keeping LPG cylinder..next to that there was a provision for the outlet of the stainless steel sink..next to that..was a space for dustbin ..inside that dustbin.,,,there was dead cockroach..karapaaanpoochi....in the mean time..the wife was standing with a shocking face..stunned by her act..
Char: Woww….my god.. what a murder..bayama irukku…
Char shouts..”Thalai..neenga engeyo poiteenga..” and falls at her mentor’s feet…
Char:”With your permission..shall I write this as a story in my blog…with some Aachi masala..”
Mentor: grrrrr……….
Monday, November 22, 2010
Research Endraaal Enna?
Oru oorla.. once upon a time.. there was a boy.. who was a very enthusiastic fellow. He joined IIIIT Gooduvaancheri to do his PhD… the most premier institute ever on earth. His name is Vivek!.
His first day at college..he walks on the road that led to his dept.He hears a voice
Senior: “Dei tamil maaalumaa?”
Vivek: Maaalumnga anna !
Senior: Seri..Where are u from?
Vivek: Blore!
Senior: Inge ..Banni Banni ..
Vivek(came near the senior) Yes !...
Senior: Enna student neee?
Vivek: PhD…
Senior: Hmm Enna research area!..
Vivek: namba Gooduvaancheri thaanga..
Senior: Deiiiiiii
Vivek: Analysis of the noodle structure of the brain of the human with masala impact on pasta attributes of the decision tree of the family tree on the love matter nga!!!
Senior: Getthu po! 2 min than pola.. nee romba fast thaaan…
Dei..oru chinna advice..Inga..Kaapiya tripleaaa adichittu…Bin , Bunnra perla..evanavadhu pidichu unnta advice panna..ketukaadha…5 letter irukara un pera…single letteraaa maaathipuduvaanga..mudinja..un aalu peraiyum maathipudivaanga…
Vivek: Aaha… Ingeyum Vandhutaangaya Vandhutaangaya…
Senior: Seri nee kelambu..2 min kooda waste panama..research pannu po..
Vivek: Oru doubt…kekalaama..??? Romba naala oru sandhegam..
Senior: Yes tell me..!
Vivek: Research na enna????
Senior: Hmm..
Senior tells something in Vivek’s ears…ragasiyam..secret!!!
Vivek: Sure..naa varen!
At 1 PM after lunch he meets the same senior..
Vivek: Am not able to find that gal..veena…! : (
Senior again tells some secret…
He goes away and meets the senior again at 3 PM.
Vivek: Assuming that the unknown gal is Veena, it looks like the gal’s characteristics match with Veena’s characteristics on a probability of 0.3 on a conditional probability that gal’s aalu is same as Veena’s Aalu which still holds a 0.5 probability.
Again the same thing happens.. Senior advises something in Vivek’s ears..Vivek goes away..
He meets the senior again at 5 PM.
Vivek: I am clear ..100 %.. that gal may be Veena or may not be Veena..That gal’s aalu may be Veena’s aalu or may not be ..But having found the fact that Veena has an aalu ..I should change my (re)search topic my premise..or gal..
Senior: DO you now understand what is research??? Who I am??? And vanishes away..
Vivek: Thalai!!! Neenga engeyo poiteenga!!!>…..
His first day at college..he walks on the road that led to his dept.He hears a voice
Senior: “Dei tamil maaalumaa?”
Vivek: Maaalumnga anna !
Senior: Seri..Where are u from?
Vivek: Blore!
Senior: Inge ..Banni Banni ..
Vivek(came near the senior) Yes !...
Senior: Enna student neee?
Vivek: PhD…
Senior: Hmm Enna research area!..
Vivek: namba Gooduvaancheri thaanga..
Senior: Deiiiiiii
Vivek: Analysis of the noodle structure of the brain of the human with masala impact on pasta attributes of the decision tree of the family tree on the love matter nga!!!
Senior: Getthu po! 2 min than pola.. nee romba fast thaaan…
Dei..oru chinna advice..Inga..Kaapiya tripleaaa adichittu…Bin , Bunnra perla..evanavadhu pidichu unnta advice panna..ketukaadha…5 letter irukara un pera…single letteraaa maaathipuduvaanga..mudinja..un aalu peraiyum maathipudivaanga…
Vivek: Aaha… Ingeyum Vandhutaangaya Vandhutaangaya…
Senior: Seri nee kelambu..2 min kooda waste panama..research pannu po..
Vivek: Oru doubt…kekalaama..??? Romba naala oru sandhegam..
Senior: Yes tell me..!
Vivek: Research na enna????
Senior: Hmm..
Senior tells something in Vivek’s ears…ragasiyam..secret!!!
Vivek: Sure..naa varen!
At 1 PM after lunch he meets the same senior..
Vivek: Am not able to find that gal..veena…! : (
Senior again tells some secret…
He goes away and meets the senior again at 3 PM.
Vivek: Assuming that the unknown gal is Veena, it looks like the gal’s characteristics match with Veena’s characteristics on a probability of 0.3 on a conditional probability that gal’s aalu is same as Veena’s Aalu which still holds a 0.5 probability.
Again the same thing happens.. Senior advises something in Vivek’s ears..Vivek goes away..
He meets the senior again at 5 PM.
Vivek: I am clear ..100 %.. that gal may be Veena or may not be Veena..That gal’s aalu may be Veena’s aalu or may not be ..But having found the fact that Veena has an aalu ..I should change my (re)search topic my premise..or gal..
Senior: DO you now understand what is research??? Who I am??? And vanishes away..
Vivek: Thalai!!! Neenga engeyo poiteenga!!!>…..
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Devargalum Asurargalum...
Sw Engg Vinod comes to office at 11 AM as usual. He switches his laptop on.All system files are sitting in their respective locations (directories).Operating System is trying to load itself.
Asurargal (Virus components) are silently getting activated.One of the Asurargal XXX1 knocks the directory of the system file…
XXX1: Hi System file..Long time no see….. Please open the door…Dei..kadava therangada….(gives out a villain Laugh..hahaha)…
System Files- Devargal are getting frightened and start talking to themselves.
S.F1: “Dei , Ennada panradhu??? Indha virus nambala corrupt panna try pannikittu irukku!!!”
S.F2: “Onnumae puriyalaye!!!!”
S.F3: Hey Don’t worry…we are all encrypted…
S.F1: Ayyo Vaangada Odalaam, adhunga nambala folder folderaaa directory directoryaaa thoradhudhu!!!
S.F3: Namba Encryption key kandupikkaradhu kashtam da…
S.F2: Dei Loosungala!!!... adunga permutation , combination , back propagation laaam podudhungada…padicha Virusaaa irukkum polarkuda..
S.F1: Seri vaaa vera vazhiye illa..namba thalaivar Vinod kitta solluvom..Lets alert him!!!!
Alert pops up on screen..
Vinod gives a strange look,…..”Aiiii blue screen… My favourite color is blue”
S.F3: Loosaaada ivan???
Vinod does something… not sure wht to do…
S.F3: Dei..ennada panraaan avan..? idhu enna Pay slip…indha muzhi muzhikaraan…Seriyaana maaangada …
S.F2: Avanukku theriyuma..theriyaadha…Pesaama…help, more details..provide pannalaam..Nilamai theriyaama thadavaraan paaru.,..
Help details..pop up..
Vinod looks at it..Whts this…Cha…Better let me take this laptop to support…
S.F1: Dei..ennada achu..
S.F2: Machan andha koomuttaiku namba kudutha mitigation details puriyalada…Suttha waste..
S.F3: Thala!,,1st level key kandupidichudichuda..adhunga…Seri..atleast support guys ll save us..
Vinod takes it to support..In between, he gets a call on his mobile from his GF Veena…and he catches a bar stool in the hall way and starts his mokkai..
S.F1: OMG! Dei namba thalaivar…samayam paaaathu kadalai poda start pannitaaan..
S.F2: Ini namba gadhi adho gadhi thaaan…System OFF aaavadhu panni vaida..
S.F3: I think we will all be rebuilt along with our house..Ivanukku ippo indhe kadalai rumba thevai!!!
Finally Laptop reaches support guy and he installs the anti virus and saves the system files…
System files are happy and smiling
S.F1: Indha loosu aduttha vaati edhaiyaachum download illa install seiyyatum..namba restart ayidanum…
S.F2:Lets give VOIP call to his mobile in the name of Veena..
S.F3: Excellent!!!... Paya apdiye..elaathaiyum marandhuduvaan!!! Hahahahahahaha
Asurargal (Virus components) are silently getting activated.One of the Asurargal XXX1 knocks the directory of the system file…
XXX1: Hi System file..Long time no see….. Please open the door…Dei..kadava therangada….(gives out a villain Laugh..hahaha)…
System Files- Devargal are getting frightened and start talking to themselves.
S.F1: “Dei , Ennada panradhu??? Indha virus nambala corrupt panna try pannikittu irukku!!!”
S.F2: “Onnumae puriyalaye!!!!”
S.F3: Hey Don’t worry…we are all encrypted…
S.F1: Ayyo Vaangada Odalaam, adhunga nambala folder folderaaa directory directoryaaa thoradhudhu!!!
S.F3: Namba Encryption key kandupikkaradhu kashtam da…
S.F2: Dei Loosungala!!!... adunga permutation , combination , back propagation laaam podudhungada…padicha Virusaaa irukkum polarkuda..
S.F1: Seri vaaa vera vazhiye illa..namba thalaivar Vinod kitta solluvom..Lets alert him!!!!
Alert pops up on screen..
Vinod gives a strange look,…..”Aiiii blue screen… My favourite color is blue”
S.F3: Loosaaada ivan???
Vinod does something… not sure wht to do…
S.F3: Dei..ennada panraaan avan..? idhu enna Pay slip…indha muzhi muzhikaraan…Seriyaana maaangada …
S.F2: Avanukku theriyuma..theriyaadha…Pesaama…help, more details..provide pannalaam..Nilamai theriyaama thadavaraan paaru.,..
Help details..pop up..
Vinod looks at it..Whts this…Cha…Better let me take this laptop to support…
S.F1: Dei..ennada achu..
S.F2: Machan andha koomuttaiku namba kudutha mitigation details puriyalada…Suttha waste..
S.F3: Thala!,,1st level key kandupidichudichuda..adhunga…Seri..atleast support guys ll save us..
Vinod takes it to support..In between, he gets a call on his mobile from his GF Veena…and he catches a bar stool in the hall way and starts his mokkai..
S.F1: OMG! Dei namba thalaivar…samayam paaaathu kadalai poda start pannitaaan..
S.F2: Ini namba gadhi adho gadhi thaaan…System OFF aaavadhu panni vaida..
S.F3: I think we will all be rebuilt along with our house..Ivanukku ippo indhe kadalai rumba thevai!!!
Finally Laptop reaches support guy and he installs the anti virus and saves the system files…
System files are happy and smiling
S.F1: Indha loosu aduttha vaati edhaiyaachum download illa install seiyyatum..namba restart ayidanum…
S.F2:Lets give VOIP call to his mobile in the name of Veena..
S.F3: Excellent!!!... Paya apdiye..elaathaiyum marandhuduvaan!!! Hahahahahahaha
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